Ask, Answer.

How can I write what I feel with out someone getting hurt? Without the tail end of the last word being that final nail on the coffin. I'm lost between the beginning and the end and the end seems a lot more desirable at this very moment, or at any moment. I don't want to try and work on things, I want things to work. I don't want to compromise, I want to do things my way. I don't want to talk, I don't want to listen, I want to be left alone in my room with nothing to do, with the world wanting me to come out.
When it's here it isn't enough, but when it's gone it's never coming back.
This is why I don't get involved, I ruin people. I make them take my everything, my self loathing, my jadedness, my selfishness, my habits, my anti social tendencies, my sociopath like frame of mind, my reclusion, everything bad in a person and nothing good to come out. I look into your past and I judge you on that. Your past makes you who you are, in the worst way for me. I have no past. I forget it. Erase it. Bury it. Burn it. So you can't do what I do to you. I have nothing to be ashamed of except my present position. Always looking down. Always looking away.
Turn off the lights because I don't want to live anymore.